When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law. Matthew 7:28-29

Jesus was compassionate, caring, kind, gracious, giving and sacrificial. Yet Jesus was unbending in His convictions and spoke with full authority. He was just and strong. He was not looking for acceptance, but to lead people to abundant living eternally and on earth. This should be a parent’s goal as well.

Like Jesus, parents should be just, strong and respected authority figures.

Being just, as a parent, means doing what is right for your child. Whatever will benefit a child’s spiritual, emotional, intellectual and even physical well being is what a parent should focus on. Making a child happy at whatever cost is not the goal of healthy parenting. A parent’s role and goal is to raise well disciplined, respectful and godly children. This can only happen when parents are strong in their convictions and a child respects their authority..

Having authority is different than being an authoritarian.

An authoritarian demands obedience using full overpowering control. There is little to no dialogue, instruction and or care for the hearts of those under them. Control and perfection are required at all times. No questions asked or else...

Having parental authority is different from being an authoritarian. Love, rules and boundaries are placed by a good parent in a child’s life for the child’s well being. A parent that exercises their godly role as the authority does so to bring security, joy and health to their child. They are always instructing and are emotionally present. They help their children understand the behavior and character God requires of them.

Parents who are permissive for the sake of avoiding conflict will not gain respect and obedience from their children.

A child will know they can get away with bad behavior if they can play on their parents emotions, and or lack of persistence and perseverance. Parents should begin adjusting their children’s behavior at a very young age. The earlier the training the earlier the compliance and development of healthy well balanced children. A parent’s will to raise well behaved children must be stronger than the will of a child to have authority in the home.

Do not justify bad behavior, deal with it. Being wishy washy with a child will only strengthen their carnal nature.

The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart.The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes. Psalm 19:8

A parent must be consistent and unbending in disciplining their children when unacceptable behavior arises. You must learn what form of discipline is effective for your child. This may change with age. The Bible clearly teaches that sparing the rod spoils the child. Trust the Bible over the psychology of culture.

When children are disciplined in their toddler years they are more likely to be well behaved before they are of school age. They have learned to respect their parent’s authority and understand there are consequences to disobedience. Disobedience = Consequence, Obedience = Blessing and Reward.

It is never OK for a child to misbehave and rebel against a parent’s authority.

A child must understand you require proper behavior. Training a child is hard work, but it is a necessary work that will result in having godly children who will accomplish the will of God for their lives.

Use wisdom, intuition and prayer to evaluate why a child may be misbehaving and correct the situation. Sometimes a child is seeking attention, may be learning bad behavior from other children, is not getting proper rest, good nutrition, etc. But even so, do not excuse away bad behavior.

Make consistent time to talk and pray with your children.

Bedtime is a good time to pray with and for your children. It is also a good time to communicate and encourage them. If bedtime is at 8PM, begin the process at 7PM. Allow time to pray and talk. But it should never be the only time. Look for special moments to parent your children, like when driving together in a vehicle, going somewhere special, etc. Make time for conversation and bonding to happen. Words such as, I love you, you are so important to me, you are amazing, etc., should always be in your vocabulary. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you.

Interesting

https://dogcare.dailypuppy.com/fun-types-dogs-3772.html

“Alpha dogs are the highest ranking members of packs. They are followed by beta dogs, and then lastly, omega dogs. Alpha dogs possess tough, controlled "take charge" temperaments. They don't follow rules; they dish them out. Beta dogs often have strong temperaments, but are undeniably lower in status than alpha dogs, and therefore accept their positions. Omega dogs, on the other hand, are rather timid and submissive canines. They are not as self-assured as the others, and sometimes are susceptible to being walked all over by the rest.”

I am not comparing children to dogs, but it is interesting that every child, like every dog, has a certain temperament. You may have an “Alpha” temperament at home that may require a greater amount of time and diligence than another temperament. The good news is, even Alpha temperaments can be trained to follow instruction and be well behaved.

BOTTOM LINE:

Your child’s happiness is not the goal of parenting.
Having authority is different than being an authoritarian.
Never justify bad behavior.
Make consistent time to talk and pray with and for your children.

Today’s Prayer: LORD, thank you for giving me the greatest gift in the world, a child. Help me to raise respectful and well behaved children who will honor your commandments. Give me the strength and fortitude to stay strong in my parenting and to not allow the carnal nature to rule in my child’s life and in my home. In Jesus Name, I pray. Amen!

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